Out in Sonoma: Gary Saperstein

You were raised in New York; what brought you to Sonoma?

I moved here 21 years ago, straight from New York. My partner at the time had an uncle who lived here and the idea of a beautiful small town sounded good to me. I met Sondra Bernstein and since I was looking for work and had been in the restaurant business, she suggested I apply at Auberge du Soleil in Oakville in the Napa Valley. They called and hired me the next day as the dining room manager and I worked there for five years. When Sondra moved the Girl and the Fig restaurant to the Plaza I went to work for her, and stayed with it for 10 years.

You’ve just finished another of your Out in the Vineyard LGBT weekends. How did it go?

Fabulous. We raised over $28,500 for Face to Face, an organization assisting in the efforts to help those with HIV/AIDS. A portion of the ticket price and 100 percent of our auction proceeds gets donated.

It seems you have become the leader of the LGBT community here in Sonoma.

I guess so…it evolved over time, just happened. It’s ok. I’m aware of the meaning of my role as a voice of the gay community.

Tell me about Sonoma’s gay community. How organized is it?

It’s actually just beginning to get organized. In Santa Rosa it’s been happening for a while. The Sonoma Gaydar group, which is mostly social, has been valuable as a regular opportunity for the LGBT community to get together monthly, and in time it will evolve into a more activist group. The gay community is liberal by nature, much like Sonoma. At Out in the Vineyard we had a representative from Congressman Thompson’s office and Sonoma City Council members came to welcome us. We feel totally supported.

What do you mean by “activist?”

Well, I think any group struggling for acceptance needs to work in two ways, activist and systemic; they are both necessary. The activist is the more visible approach which shakes people up and the systemic is more behind the scenes working within the system to make changes. As a group we want to establish a task force to identify the needs of the gay community, but also we are part of the Sonoma community as a whole and want to participate in social, economic and cultural matters.

And you are now on the radio, right?

Yep. Thursday nights at 8 p.m. The Out in the Vineyard Radio Show. We examine LGBT issues, conduct interviews, that sort of thing. But also entertainment!

The Supreme Court will shortly make its decision on Gay Marriage. Any thoughts?

I think it could go either way, but our community will not let things go backwards. Listening to the Republican candidates I suspect they would love the court to rule in favor of gay marriage so they can blame the court and get the heat off themselves. The new fight is over referendums about religious belief allowing people to discriminate against gays. I hate feeling like a second-class citizen.

Got a dream?

Sure…when I’m 75 I hear a 21-year-old gay ask, “You mean there was a time gays couldn’t get married?”

Interview by Larry Barnett