Rude Awakenings ~ Catherine Sevenau

Catherine Sevenau An irreverent humorist, astute storyteller, and local author, Catherine posts her family memoir, “Through Any Given Door,” as a free web serial at www.Sevenau.com. She also is co-host of Random Acts, a monthly open mic at Readers’ Books located just off the Sonoma plaza. You can reach her at [email protected]

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Dharma or karma?

Posted on September 6, 2017 by Catherine Sevenau

“We’ve been brought here for a very short time—against our will—and we don’t know why.” I love that line. What is the point of all this? Why are we here? What is our true purpose? These thoughts keep some of us up at night; others have never examined the questions. Some think life is meaningless, that it has no purpose, that it is simply a terrible misunderstanding. Others make it mean whatever they want it to mean.

I don’t believe any of us are here on a whim. I think each of us has a purpose—even if only to serve as a warning for everyone else. But for whatever reasons we ‘re in this body on this planet at this time, we all have gifts to give, we make a difference, and we matter.

Suppose that we’re here to discover our true selves, and to serve others through our unique, creative expressions. I asked myself, “Why am I here?” and gave that question more than a fair amount of thought. Looking for my life’s purpose was like a fish looking for water; when it surrounds around you, it takes a bit to see.

When I examined my commitments, those places where I direct my energy, where I lose track of time amidst my total absorption, my unique gifts became apparent. I’m a connector, here to keep “family” together, historically, biographically, and personally. I’m here to be a storyteller, to make people think and to make them laugh. I’m here to teach: I know a lot about some things and a little about others. These engagements, individually and in concert, dance inside my heart.

I didn’t choose the modes in which I’ve spent my life, rather, they subtly chose me. I get this magnetic pull inside me where wild horses couldn’t stop me. I didn’t plan on starting a carrot juice company any more than I planned on owning a real estate business. Nor did I plan on getting married and being a mother, a businesswoman, a seeker, a dancer, or a writer. Life happens. My childhood, genetics, and karma have played a part, as have the choices I’ve made. I listen to that pull in my gut, even when it makes no sense. I pay attention to the clues that come my way and connect the dots. I notice when synchronicity appears. Curiosity, excitement, and trust propel me on the path of creating and doing what I love. It’s endless and ever changing. I don’t worry when I’ll get there (as there is no there) so I follow my heart and continue on that winding path, wherever it may lead. It also matters not that I have no sense of direction; I always end up where I need to be, even if I’m not happy with where I am or it doesn’t look like I think it should.

There was a time when I struggled, when I had no idea what I was supposed to be doing to make a difference. In my angst, a wise friend and teacher gently put his hand on my shoulder and said, “You don’t have to do anything, you just show up and be you.” Seems easy enough, to be present and simply be me… except for those times when I wear my halo a little too tight, am annoyingly bossy, or am a walking complaint; then I get to be the warning for others.

Oh well, sometimes you get to be the windshield, and sometimes you get to be the bug.

 



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