Why the Women’s March matters

We, the people, want our voices heard. We can’t accomplish change alone but there is power in numbers. We are empowered when we go eyeball to eyeball. We feel a palpable personal power when we gather. As Dana Jack says, in “Silencing the Self”: “depression and despair is caused by isolation and loneliness.”

In my mind, the January 19 Women’s March was an important coming together.  See photos.

We, the people, won’t be silenced or shut down – all races, creeds, ages and genders who care about the common good. It is time to take responsibility for the world we want to see. The march was and is for women’s rights, and against sexual assault and harassment — but also about respect for all life and ending violence, prejudice and hatred that scares and divides us all.

At this cold winter time of year, we can unify by becoming better at being in relationships and valuing common decency, safety, healthy air, our ability to buy groceries, healthcare, housing, conflict resolution, and all that matters to us.

We can take responsibility for a fair world, instead of sitting back and blaming some big orange headed, bird brained predatory beast for the mess. I never dreamed I’d be seeing more violence on TV and all my women friends buying mace. But, we all have emotional hairballs at this time of year. I know I’m aghast (or maybe full of gas) over the political turbulence we are in.

This march and the inevitable ones to follow can be the beginning of supportive relationships  instead of the continuation of top-down politics.

Our president, a “day-glow roadside billboard about jock itch” (Anna Merlan) is wearing on us. And despite our best efforts, Brett Kavanaugh was confirmed. Still, it is in these moments of defeat -hopeful, collective struggle retains its greatest power.

Some of the most profound and touching writing I’ve found this year about how we might create a better future was written by Ady Barkan who was diagnosed with terminal cancer, ALS, at the age of 32. Along with his wife and two children, he carries on, in spite of his grief:

“I can transcend my dying body by hitching my future to yours. We can transcend the darkness of this moment by joining the struggles of past and future freedom fighters. That is how, when we reach the end of our lives and look back on these heady moments, we will find peace in the knowledge that we did our best.”

He refers to the well known Serenity Prayer, popular in the twelve step programs:  “the difference between what we can and cannot change can only be earned through struggle. Neuroscientists seek a cure for ALS because they do not accept its inevitability. Organizers rage against the machines of capitalism with that same determination. It is only by refusing to accept the complacency of previous generations that the impossible becomes reality. For me, Niebuhr’s prayer is most true if rearranged: Collective courage must come first, wisdom second, and serenity at the very end.”

Many people have worked hard to make these marches happen. As Erich Fromm wrote, “Love means active concern.”

People, get off the couch.