Loss of dog brings heartache

Dear Dr. Forsythe: My little Bichon Frise disappeared from our side yard two months ago when I was having some work done on my house. We never got her back even though we tried like crazy to find her. At this point I’m not sure if she was stolen or something else happened to her, but I can’t stop wondering where she is. Every time I see a dog like her I go up real close and look. A few weeks ago I even approached a young woman and asked her where she got her dog, thinking it was mine. I just can’t seem to accept the fact that Gigi is gone. What can I do to get over my obsession and this loss?

Aching in Napa

Dear Aching: The loss of a pet is a very personal, painful event to go through. It sounds like you’re harboring some guilt about the loss of Gigi, but it’s probably time for you to forgive yourself for her escape since it was an accident. You mentioned that you “tried like crazy” to get her back. Once you’ve done that, it is out of your hands, and worrying and agonizing seems fruitless to me.
Pet loss support groups can help, and therapy might be necessary if you are inclined to approach strangers with dogs who resemble yours. The key to “moving on” is within you, every person mourns the loss of a pet in a different way over a different duration of time. How about diverting some of your energy by volunteering at the local animal shelter? I bet you would be excellent helping the adoption area, matching pets with potential families. I’ll bet the distraction would do you good – and help you heal at the same time.
Dr. F

Dear Dr. Forsythe: My dog has a small mast cell tumor on his neck which was diagnosed a few weeks ago from a fine needle aspirate. I have decided not to have the mass removed, but to monitor the tumor on his skin and watch it for changes. I may try holistic medicine from the internet. What are the advantages of this?

Signed, Mast Cell Dog owner

Dear Mast Cell Dog Owner: The only advantages of not removing the mass immediately with good surgical margins are:
You will save money on vet bills,
You will save money on dog food because you won’t need to buy it for very long.
In my opinion, by not treating this type of tumor appropriately, your pet’s prognosis is very poor. Cutaneous mast cell tumors, i.e. on the skin, are dangerous and should be treated aggressively. These are not “wait and see” tumors or “check the internet for home remedy” tumors. This is dangerous and potentially life threatening cancer. I’d let your vet treat this as soon as possible – so you can continue to need to buy dog food for a few more years! Good luck!
Dr. F