Fido – in or out of the marriage bed?
Dear Dr. Forsythe: Please settle a dispute for me and my husband. Our three-year-old Boxer has taken to popping up on the bed nightly and is not willing to stay on his bed anymore. It started when my husband was away on a business trip and I let “Buster” curl up at my feet all night long. Now, Buster has developed this desire to be on the bed all the time, and my husband is reluctant to go along with it. I think it is sweet. After all, Buster is not the one who tosses and turns – my husband does that! Please let us know how you feel about pets sleeping in the bed with owners. Your advice will be taken into consideration. – Mrs. D, Kenwood
Dear Mrs. D: I think that a picture is worth a thousand words. Here is my bed partner.
As you can tell, my personal belief is in sharing your bed with your dog. And yes, I even have the shirt from Sonoma Dog camp that says “sleeps with dogs.” In your case, it sounds like you are torn between two partners: one is a man, the other, beast. If your husband isn’t on board with having “Buster” share the sheets with both of you, I’d suggest you immediately make an adjustment and consistently keep the pooch on a bed on the floor unless you want your man to take up residence at the Carneros Inn or begin taking longer business trips. In my personal case, Dooney gets half my king size bed and goes ahead and hogs all the covers – own comforter and all. He also burps, farts and snores. Oh, do I sound bitter? Yes. Angry? A little. Desperate? Okay, a lot. But the point is that he is my most loyal and devoted chum, so he gets the right side of my bed. Ahhh, that is until Mr. Right comes along. And even then Dooney will still have a nice comfy feather bed at the foot of the bed, but on the floor – and I think he will be able to cope with the trauma. But one thing that should never be negotiable is making your husband feel like the king of the world when lights go out. Pets should enhance our lives, not come between us. Please heed this advice, and enjoy your wonderful life together with your man and your flat-faced beast. – Dr. F
Dear Dr. Forsythe: My sister’s youngest son is mildly autistic. She recently got a young kitten hoping this would be good for her little boy. Unfortunately I have seen him swinging the kitten around several times while I’ve been over visiting and even seen him drop the kitten three feet onto the ceramic tile. I’m really worried that my sister isn’t monitoring things carefully enough – no kitten should be picked up by the tail. Do you think I should intervene before something happens to the little kitten? – Don’t use my name please
Dear No Name: Please intervene!! This little kitten is being mishandled for the sake of a young child with a disability from what you describe and it constitutes animal abuse. Sometimes parents who mean well get children pets hoping that a kitten or puppy will improve the child’s situation. However, since your sister is not watching carefully enough and your nephew is tossing the kitten about and dropping it, it is only a matter of time before this “bouncing baby ball-kitten” gets a serious injury or dies. Picking a kitten up by the tail? Really? What do they think it is, string cheese? Now I am all for being kind and gentle with children who are needing extra TLC, but giving a special needs child free reign with a kitten and not monitoring its handling just doesn’t work. In my opinion you have an obligation to protect this kitten – speak up and let your sister know that you have seen the kitten dropped on the tile and swung like a lasso. Tell her if she doesn’t get it under control, you’ll either take the kitten or call the authorities. And then go out and get a great stuffed kitten for your nephew. They don’t break and their tails won’t come off even with moderate swinging. Thanks for your concerns and for writing in. – Dr. F
