On Monday, Oct. 22, at 7 p.m., a small, intently focused group of adults gathered in the Myron DeLong Room at the Sonoma Valley library for a panel presentation on gang problems. The flyer had urged, “Fight the Madness – Step into the Light.” We were drawn to the library by its words of hope: “As a community we can . . . find ways to make . . . the violence of gangs not a growing reality but a receding memory.”
And who were we? We were the familiar faces, already deeply involved in youth education – teachers, program directors, board members, and youth leaders. We were the ones who were not in denial.
“Ironic” is overused and too often misused. But it is sadly and brutally applicable to our experience that evening. Less than a mile away in Maxwell Park, a tragic, gang-related event was concurrently unfolding. Cloistered inside, we were totally unaware. We left the library moved, inspired, already planning how to “fight the madness” – only to step into the lights of police activity.
What had we heard inside the library? Although isolated we were far from insulated. Five Sonoma County men and one woman told their stories. Their average age was about 26 and among them they had spent nearly 35 years in prison. One former Sureño was there, one Norteño. What did we see? Tattoos, although they mentioned that some significant ones were not displayed. Oversized clothing. Hairnets. What did they bring? Sincerity. Remorse. Candor. Shame. Responsibility.
The woman shyly told us that her two children had both been born in prison. Her own childhood had been a happy one. One of the men told us his daughter, born when he was doing time, was nine when he got out. He went back inside again, but not wanting to lose his new son’s childhood as well, he was moved to change his life. Telling his story was “atonement.”
These extraordinarily brave young men and women were all quick to say they had not cleared themselves of the effects on their lives led as crack users, gang members, meth freaks, murderers, dealers, criminals, outcasts, all of the above. Their vulnerability, fragility was clear. A 19-year-old has just gained through therapy a sense of self, which lets him speak out. Most are still actively involved in therapy, counseling and rehabilitation. I felt how painful it must have been for them to have learned of the shooting nearby.
Bob Florez of Kids in Community brought this forum to Sonoma. In his introduction, he asserted that our young people need “community” and “connection,” and that they will seek it elsewhere if our leaders do not make sure to provide it. To a teacher’s question as to what she could do, a panelist replied, “Interact, help them have positive interactions.”
The denial must stop. Few parents or business leaders were at the library to hear those young adults who bravely offered up their stories. The tragedy playing out that evening in the park tells us we cannot afford not to connect. Let us hope that the whole community will begin to fight the madness.
Anna Pier is Director of Educational Programs for the CommonBond Foundation in Sonoma.
