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Dear Dr. Forsythe: My little Chihuahua absolutely adores me and follows me around the house everywhere I go. Unfortunately, she isn’t nearly as fond of my husband, and I would like it if she would show him that same level of affection. How can I get her to warm up to him?
Chihuahua mom
Dear Chihuahua mom: The human animal bond is a special and wonderful connection that is fluid and individual. Pets develop a fondness and affection for their human the way people are drawn to each other. It’s almost like chemistry, and I don’t really believe it can be forced. However, your husband could try making an effort to spend more time with the little pet and offer treats and affection in order to get in her good graces. Who feeds her? Who walks her? (Silly me, do her feet really ever touch the ground?) Perhaps your husband could be more involved the day-to-day activities that involve her pampering and care, thus improving the chances of bonding. If he’s willing, let him feed her, give her treats, and have cuddle time for a couple of weeks, to see this improves their bonding. But remember, pets do have their idiosyncrasies, just like people do.
When I go to my ex-wife’s house to pick up my children, their half-Chihuahua/half Shih Tzu “Honey Bunny” runs to the door and growls for me to pick her up. If I don’t immediately respond to her demand for love, she literally goes bonkers. Once I have picked her up, kissed her little black nose, petted her little apple-dome head and generally worshipped her, she begins to calm down and come back to a normal state. My family marvels at how she seems to remember that I’m the one who picked her out and got her for the family – and she seems to love me in a special way – even though I’m the one who has spayed her and poked her with needles! It makes no sense to them, or to me, but it is what it is. I suppose the lesson here is that most pets will just be who they are and dispense their love in ways we may not understand, and often we just need to appreciate every lap we get and thank God for the pets in our lives.
Dr. F
Dear Dr. Forsythe: I am really annoyed with my dog, who keeps getting up and mounting furniture and even my friends when they come over. It is embarrassing, and this is going on even after we had him neutered. He has gotten on other male dogs too, and now we are thinking he may be gay. Could this be what his problem is? Please let us know. Thank you for taking our question.
Confused dog
Dear Confused dog: First, I want to thank you for writing. I’ve been asked this question before, and I know there are people who wonder about it. Generally, it is believed that when male (or female) dogs get up and “mount” same sex pets or furniture or objects, it is an act of dominance. Often pets will continue these behaviors for several days after being spayed or neutered while hormone levels descend. Just like chewing or excessive barking is an undesirable behavior to most dog owners, the mounting is irritating and embarrassing and can be eradicated by enlisting the help of an experienced dog trainer.
I think it is very unlikely that your pet is “gay,” and even if he were, I don’t personally think it would be a “problem.” Take for example, the case of Roy and Silo, the chinstrap Penguins at the Central Park Zoo in Manhattan, who are completely devoted to each other. They exhibit what in penguin talk is described as “ecstatic behavior”: that is, they entwine their necks, they vocalize to each other, they have sex. Silo and Roy are, to anthropomorphize a bit, gay penguins. When offered female companionship, they have adamantly refused it. And the females aren’t interested in them either. And apparently they are doing quite well. They certainly are not dogs, and I think they may be a bit unusual, but at least it is an interesting story from the animal world. Thanks for your good question and good luck getting a good trainer to help redirect your pet.
Dr. F
