(Bob Edwards/Sun Cynic) I am not a scientist, but I say: Thank Dog, the drought is over. Still, it should come as no surprise that those of us who see with our own eyes that all that water in the wine cellar means the drought is over are getting more than a little push-back from those atheists over at the National Weather Bureau.
The Bureau is part of the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, or “NOAA,” which not so coincidentally rhymes with “NOAH” who, as everyone knows, wrote the bible on water and whose bio-epic documentary is enjoying a lot of traffic on Netflix these days. So one would think the Bureau’s so-called scientists would recognize a flood when they saw one.
But no. Instead, they and their spawn at the County and City water agencies point to depth gauges, wiggly charts and graphs, formulas and computer print-outs and insist that these last few storms haven’t even begun to top off the lakes and reservoirs, fill the aquifers or pack the snow packs. They say it will take many more storms for California just to break even, water-wise.
Well, maybe it’s time they cast off the satanic spell of algebra and took a good look at Nathanson Creek.
Thankfully, people of faith pay these scientists no mind, and here in wine country there are no more piously faithful people than the unnecessarily wealthy developers and whineries who have lovingly set their languid eyes and manicured hands on the soft thigh of Sonoma Valley. As you read this they may already be dusting off plans for 28 new hotels, 1,512 housing units, 100 vacation rentals, a dozen more tasting rooms, a couple of shopping centers on the Sonoma Development Center, a Depot Park waterslide and 6,000 acres of new vineyards. All of which need LOTS of water.
Yes, their faith is a powerful thing, and everyone knoweth it only groweth stronger when watered with prayerful solicitations and lovingly fertilized with campaign contributions. History demonstrates time and again that, verily, such a well-nourished faith overcometh all obstacles, most notably common sense.
For example, only powerful faith can explain how, throughout the centuries, Peace appears so often in a troubled world. War after war, uprising after uprising, genocide after genocide, national defense after national defense, ISIS after ISIS, hardly a day goes by when there is not a report of another peace, another Cross-Our-Hearts-And-Hope-To-Die-For-Sure-This-Time unconditional ceasefire — in Lebanon, Palestine, Ukraine, Nigeria, Libya, Syria, the West Bank, the East Bank, Afghanistan, Pakistan, Cotati, etc.
The number of peaces is at least as plentiful as the number of wars, and why nobody makes a fuss over them is a mystery. Here in the USA, Fox News and CNN never mention how peace appears time and again, gun-shot after gun-shot, riot after riot, school massacre after school massacre. Why, as this goes to press the police have not shot another kid or mentally ill man or homeless person since – well, see? who can even remember? – and they probably won’t shoot another one until after all the fires are put out from the last time they shot one. Meanwhile, peace will reign in the streets of our communities, no thanks to godless science.
If faith delivereth time and again, then believing that the worst drought in California’s recorded history is finally over is, literally, a no-brainer for the local faithful. Even the pointy-headed scientists at NOAA and in the water department will eventually come around to admit that all their slide-ruling, satellite-mapping, soil-testing, computer-modeling, test-drilling, depth-gauging, well-watching, book-learning, meter-reading “data” doesn’t have a prayer against such faith.
Verily, faith in the Profits will make our Valley the Promised Land of Eternal Growth, and asphalt pavement that stretcheth to the sea.
This article is very hard to read. Not difficult, I had no problems understanding the words. They just made my head ache.
To Dr. Cornwater: Verily!