Who let the dogs in?

Dr. Forsythe:

I recently attended my nephew’s wedding in Malibu.  It was one of those events where there were over 500 guests in attendance, and we were driven to the venue on the beach in special cars.  Everything was truly splendid with the ceremony with the exception of one problem. All the dogs. The bride had her dog and carried it down the aisle.  The flower girl walked a dog down the aisle with a pit bull puppy.  Two of the ushers ushered their large shepherds down the aisle as they escorted bride’s maids.  The maid of honor was toting an Afghan hound.  And of course, many of the esteemed guests had their pets in hand as well.  I wasn’t sure if this was a society wedding or an event in honor of the SPCA.

The bride held her dog, a tiny white Chihuahua, in her arms in lieu of a bouquet.  This would have been fine except the little thing barked the entire time the groom (my nephew) spoke his vows.  Then, when the ring bearer raised up his pillow to offer the rings, the best man’s Rottweiler grabbed the pillow and began a game of tug-of-war with the little boy’s pillow holding the rings.  The wedding rings flew into the sand and it took several minutes for the ushers and my nephew to locate them and regain their composure to get back to the wedding ceremony.  Once that chaos and laughter stopped, a little Cocker Spaniel seemed to appear out of nowhere, came toddling up the aisle, peed on the mother of the bride’s chair and then sat down next to the Pastor.  All in all, I was shocked at the number of dogs barking, roaming around, out of control and able to do whatever they wanted.

Once the ceremony was over, I was relieved, but wondered who would be caring for the menagerie while the reception took place.  I couldn’t imagine all the dogs participating in a fancy reception with a sit down dinner.  Well, I was wrong.  At nearly every one of the large round tables in the banquet room, guests had their dogs with them and behaved as if their animal had received a written invitation to the wedding (for all I know, they did!).

Dr. Forsythe, I am completely in favor of treating pets like family, but this seemed like it was over the top.  Am I crazy for thinking that too many dogs at the wedding spoiled what could have been a beautiful ceremony?

Crazy Aunt

Dear Crazy Aunt:

Wow, this is a first for me.  I’ve attended some fun weddings, and even a few where there was a pet or two involved, but this wedding is the first where the pet-to-guest ratio was out of control.  By all means, I think that the pet attendance at this ceremony clearly destroyed what should have been a sacred and special event.

In my opinion, it would a have been appropriate for the bride to have her dog (and perhaps the groom’s) or perhaps the couple to have their joint pet or two pets involved, but when the entire ceremony is bombarded with a cluster of dogs that overwhelm the affair, it destroys the precious culture of the occasion and diminishes its importance.  It’s too bad that there wasn’t somebody in attendance to simply control the animals and see that they didn’t destroy the ambiance of the party. I wonder if anybody gave thought to an “animal run-through” to avoid the catastrophe that happened when the Rottweiler tried to eat the wedding rings?

To me, you are absolutely right – too many pups spoiled the recipe.  I only hope that the bride and groom look back on the occasion with joy and happiness, and a sense of humor, because they must be animal loving people, and lets hope not too many of the guests stepped in, or danced through, any little ‘presents’ the dogs may have left at the reception.

Dr. F.