Where’s the bathroom, and other nagging questions

Posted on April 17, 2022 by Sonoma Valley Sun

By Tim Zahner | For The Sun —

Questions. We get questions at the two Visitors Centers in Sonoma Valley. You want an answer, step up and ask us a question.

You sir, the fidgety one who just got off the bus. I’m assuming you’re asking our top question – and the answer is right around the back – push the door – it sticks at times – and come back here when you need a map or guide.

Questions – sometimes they email us at [email protected] and we take turns answering it. Here’s one: “Should I get married. In Sonoma?”

I’m going to assume the question was actually meant as “Should I get married in Sonoma?” and you are also asking where you should get married. But maybe you meant to send this to Dear Abby or Miss Lonelyhearts and instead it came to us. Well we answer questions, and this is a question, so here goes:

I can’t tell you if you should get married or not. Marriage is not easy. One day you think everything is perfect and butterflies and rainbows and then a heartbeat later you’re in your nice clothes ready to go to work pulling horrific rat’s nests of hair and soap slime out of a shower drain while a puppy piddles on the floor behind you and you wonder, “how did I get here?” Well, my friend, marriage. That’s how you got here. 

And it doesn’t end there – there’s grease going down the sink but no one seems to remember how it got there even though the teenager has bacon-oil on his hands, and then you have to constantly pound on the bathroom door and yell – “for God’s sake child we are IN A DROUGHT” – and then you’re threatening to take away all showers and issue everyone a simple, three-gallon bucket that will serve as their water allowance for the day because at the end of it, marriage comes with problems, many of which are the plumbing variety, so think carefully about joining an institution that requires you to have a pipe wrench and drain snake and be on call basically 24 hours a day.

But if you’re up for it, yeah, get married in Sonoma. We have a lot of info on our website and happy to send you ideas on venues and the like. Just be sure to register at your local plumbing supply shop. 

Questions – sometimes they text us at 707-996-1090 and we answer it.

“Where can I go wine tasting?”

This is Sonoma, so basically anywhere, but more specifically I’d recommend one of the 100 wineries or tasting rooms within the area. From St. Francis Winery in the northern part of the Valley to Viansa in the south, there are lots of options. We’ve got a castle at Ledson and we’ve got secret patios at Wine Snob in Glen Ellen or great conversations at Rancho Maria on the Plaza, ask for Daniel or Sebastian. They all have great wine – this is Sonoma – so pick one and start exploring. Kunde has mountain top tasting, Benziger has a tractor and there’s a very large bear outside St. Anne’s Crossing. 

Questions – we get questions – and the gentleman from the first question is back from the facilities. Very well, can we recommend a place for lunch? And do you have time for  a bike ride?

See you at the Visitors Centers soon – come ask us a question.

Tim Zahner is the executive director of the Sonoma Valley Visitors Bureau





Sonoma Sun | Sonoma, CA