Loretta Carpio Carr: Giving of Your Heart, One-by-one

Along with the rising cost of gasoline, insurance, groceries, water, gas and electricity, and taxes, I have noticed the increase in ticket costs to attend fundraisers for local nonprofits. 

While I’d like to support community groups, I can’t afford the $150, $250 or $400 price to get in – and that’s for one person. So I have to find more modest, personal ways to help others one-by-one. 

There is a young man who works at a local financial institution I do business with. He is very friendly, polite and willing to make conversation. Inquisitive teacher that I am, I asked him where he grew up and where he went to school. Turns out he is from the Cloverdale area and has completed two years of college. 

I took that opportunity to encourage him to complete his degree, and since I am a Sonoma State University alumna, I told him about my positive experiences there. 

“Where do you live now?” I asked.

To my astonishment, he replied, “Rohnert Park.”

“You’re right there! Go check out SSU. The time is going to pass anyway, so why not take a class or two each semester and finish your degree?” 

I guess he thought about it because the next time I went into the bank, he told me he had enrolled. That was a year ago. He’s still taking classes, but he’s now looking into law enforcement training, which costs a lot of money. There is the possibility of scholarship/sponsorship if he can fulfill all the requirements and provide several references. 

I couldn’t help but smile. Here’s my opportunity to help. I gave him my card with contact information, and assured him I would be willing to provide a positive reference. I think he was happy, but I was happier being able to assist in a small way – one by one. I hope I will be invited to his commencement. 

Our interaction reminded me of another young man I met at the community college writing center where I worked. He was a very tall, redheaded guy who didn’t play basketball. He preferred business and literary activities. He always came prepared to work on his essays and had a lot of impressive ideas to relate. 

After he didn’t show up for a few days, my coworker showed me an obituary in the newspaper. It was our student’s mother. He had shared that his father had been ill, so his mother was the caregiver. How startling that she was the one who passed away. 

I went to the staff workroom and looked up the student’s phone number. When I called to express our concern and support, he was surprised to hear from someone at the college. He later sent a card saying how important that was to his ability to continue school. 

He earned his AA degree, but I wasn’t going to let him stop there. As an informal recruiter, I made appointments for him at the SSU Business Department and Counseling, and drove him there on the assigned day. He already had a friend living in the dorms, so while he dropped in for a visit, I explored downtown Cotati. Upon picking him up an hour later, we went to the SSU bookstore where I bought him a school sweatshirt. That was my sneaky pressure on him to stay in school and finish. 

A couple of years later, he invited me to his commencement where he, his father, his friends, and I were so elated and proud I can’t sufficiently describe it. I was happier at his graduation than I had been at my own 40 years earlier. I want to experience that feeling again as many times as possible. 

So that brings me to my frequent grocery shopping in Sonoma. A young lady checker recognized me from my work at the community college. She told me she had also completed two years of higher education, and her parents wanted her to get her Bachelors Degree from Sonoma State. Oh boy, here we go again. Yay! I intend to help in any way I can. 

If you have much, give of your wealth; if you have little, give of your heart.

PROVERB